I'm Bleeding!

Church yesterday was exciting. Nathan had to work from noon to 5PM, so I wasn't planning on going to Sacrament meeting. I planned on showing up in time for Sunday School, that way I could just drop Megan off at Primary and Jeremy off in Nursery. However, the subject for the next post changed things a bit and I decided to try Sacrament meeting. A friend offered to sit with me and help out with the kids, so I figured it wouldn't be too bad.

It ended up that we got there late and I didn't feel like dragging three kids through the pews, so I decided we'd sit out in the foyer and listen to the meeting instead. It was still difficult, but not as bad. Jeremy constantly tried to get into the Chapel and succeeded once, getting all the way up to the stand and onto the lap of our first councilor. I was feeding Emma and couldn't just run up there. Luckily, my friend that offered to help saw what was happening and ran up to get him. Then she let him sit with her and her family for a while. Megan, on the other hand, was "Little Miss Immodest." The girl loves to (loudly) point out girls that dress immodestly and loves to tell me when the Disney princesses aren't dressed appropriately, especially Jasmine. But put her in a dress and she will sit in the most inappropriate positions so that all you can see is her bright, multi-colored panties. I could not get the girl to close her legs for more than ten seconds.

It wouldn't have been too bad if that was all she'd done during the meeting. However, there would be no post if that was it. As the closing prayer was being given she started to open a door into the vestibule. I didn't want her and Jeremy going into the vestibule and escaping outside, so I told her to come back and fold her arms for the prayer. She looked right at me, opened the door, let Jeremy through into the vestibule, and then started to walk into it- all the while watching my eyes flicker. I'd had enough of her not listening to me.

Of course it wasn't just the underwear thing where she'd been disobedient, there was a multitude of little things, so it was not like "Ok, that's the second thing you've done to tick me off, no more nice mom!"

I went over to her and told her to sit down on a chair for a time out. She yelled no at me and so I told her that if she didn't go sit down, I would pick her up and put her in the chair. Once again she yelled no at me. I told her to stop yelling no and of course she yelled no at me again. I picked her up and put her in the chair. She continued to yell no at me over and over. I went back to her after getting Jeremy out of the vestibule and warned her that I'd give her spanking if she continued yelling no. She yelled no and so I smacked her upper thigh. It wasn't hard, but it did echo, thanks to the wonderful acoustics of the foyer.

As soon as I stepped away from her so I could go catch Jeremy again she began to cry. No, cry isn't a strong enough word. It was more like a great wailing and gnashing of teeth. Then came the kicker. She began to scream, "It's bleeding!! It's bleeding!" Over and over she proclaimed to the whole ward, that was by now getting up from Sacrament meeting, that she was bleeding. Of course she wasn't bleeding, but this is one of her favorite things to say after getting a spanking. I don't know if she honestly thinks she's bleeding or not, but it is really annoying.

Now you have to understand. I really didn't spank her hard at all. You could pat her head with one finger and if she misinterprets it (or interprets it correctly for that matter) as a punishment, then she will promptly scream out in "pain" and declare that she will die from your intolerable and insensitive cruelty. The girl is a Drama Queen in every sense.

Does anyone else's kids do this? I thought for sure someone was going to call Child Protection Services on me.