The first time this is how it went down.
Guy at register: So, this is your last one, right?
Me: Huh?
Guy at register: This is your last one.
Me: [My last what? Box of Oreos? He notices my confused look and points at Emma, Jeremy, then my bulging stomach.] No, and actually I have another one, too. I've got three kids, this will be my fourth, and I want one more after that.
Guy at register: Seriously? Wow. [Goes back to his job.]
Second time.
Girl bagging my groceries: Are you done after this one?
Me: No.
Girl bagging my groceries: Really? How many do you want?
Me: [Is she talking about scoops of ice cream?] I've always wanted five, so one more after this.
Girl bagging my groceries: I've got one and that's all I can handle. God bless you.
Me: Yeah. [walk away]
Today.
Guy with a cart: Here mam. [Pushes a cart with a broken restraining strap and an annoying wheel at me]
Me: Thanks.
Guy no longer with a cart: [Eyes wide, head shaking] God bless you.
Me: [Very confused look on face] Huh?
Guy no longer with a cart: This is your last one, right?
Me: [Still confused] Last what?
Guy no longer with a cart: [Points to my belly] Your last one.
Me: [Look down at my own belly] Um, no.
Guy no longer with cart: [Head cocks to the side, eyebrows furrow] Last one?
Me: [Shaking my head] NO. [Slowly and loudly, enunciating each word] I want one more after this.
Guy no longer with cart: What?
Me: I want five kids. [Guy starts to back away] I plan on having one more after this. Is it really any of your business?
Really? And why do all of these idiots work at the same grocery store? That was the last straw so I went to customer service and spoke to a manager. Luckily, he was horrified that I'd had these experiences in his store. I expect to not be asked any more baby related questions or have God's blessings called down upon me by strangers wearing grocery store smocks.
