Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Tips?

Do any of you have any good suggestions for getting a kid to sleep in her own bed? Emma likes my bed. Emma likes to sleep only in my bed. This means I don't get to sleep. The last few nights have been terrible, so last night I told her she had to sleep in her bed. I took her from my room back to her room until 1:30AM. She screamed bloody murder the entire time.

Usually Jeremy can sleep through her crying and banging on the door, but last night was so bad he woke up about 5 times because of her.

At 7AM she came into our bed again and I was too tired to fight it. A few minutes later, Megan came into my bed. Megan has not come into bed with us for over a year. According to her, she was "cold." My body heat isn't good for anything, so I know I didn't warm her up.

Then five minutes later, Jeremy came into bed me. By this point, Nathan was up and getting ready to leave for school. Jeremy hasn't come into our bed in months. Last night was supposed to be a kid-free sleep.

I woke up pretty upset and it just got worse and worse. Jeremy and Emma fought over who could lay next to me (Megan had the edge of the bed, there was no making her move), and Megan kept telling me she was hungry. We keep Pop Tarts where she can reach them for just such an occasion as me not wanting to get out of bed yet. Jeremy and Emma like to kick me when they are in bed with me (which was our main reason for not letting Jeremy be in our bed anymore. Emma likes to play with my hair as she falls asleep, which is oh-so-cute when it's in the rocking chair, but quickly loses its cuteness when I'm trying to fall asleep and it begins to feel more like she's pulling my hair out instead of twirling it.

I need help. I hate books and Super Nanny (who I usually love) when they say to keep taking the child back to their bed and they'll get the message, so please don't offer that advice. They don't get it. And if they do, they don't care about the message. Emma didn't used to have a little rasp to her voice--she got that from screaming for FOREVER one day. She's fine with screaming for hours, she doesn't care. So I need some advice for how to get an almost 2 year old to sleep in her own bed that doesn't include the unhelpful, "just keep putting her in her own bed."

PLEASE!

16 comments:

Janelle said...

Install a lock on your bedroom door that can only be locked or unlocked from inside the room. Lock your door at night, and they'll eventually get the picture.

Kristine said...

I wish I could offer you something but I can't. The one good thing about bottle feeding my kids is I had to get up and make it so my kids have never been in my bed. They know my bed is off limits. We do lock Alessia in her room every night to keep her in there but that won't solve your screaming problem. I hope you come up with something soon that works for you. Because I know how much you need sleep cause I need it too.

Wade, Jenny, and Girls said...

You could lock her in a room. My cousin did that with her little boy...worked well until she started to potty train him! :) GOod Luck!

katie said...

Bribery. I use it for everything. Just went to mcdonalds today for keeping the bed dry for a week and for not having to nag Blake about getting ready for school. By the way, noticed your countdown on your sidebar. I'm a week behind you. It seems to get worse every time.

janeen said...

Once you figure it out let me know. Rylee will be 3 in June and still refuses to get out of my bed. The only time she's not sleeping in my bed is when I move to the couch and than she wakes up and has to find me.

janeen said...

And congrats, I didn't notice the new count down bar but thanks to Katie's comment, I figurecd it out.

Raspberry said...

I'm a bit worried about this stage myself - my child has a tendency to get distracted by toys so easily that when we transition I'm pretty sure bedtime is going to go from awesome to a pain in the expletive.
Anyways.
I have a friend that puts a gate up on her kid's door. That at the very least keeps them in there. I also know a parent that let their child scream and wear themselves out and they never did it again...I also know a parent (mine, actually) that with their grandchild (not mine, Jakes) put one of those plastic knob things on the inside knob so that he can't get out. I think I prefer that way, but, ah well, we'll see. In 6 months I'll be coming to you with tears, just wait. :)

Michael and Shannon said...

Hmmmm, quite the dilemma. We've been there, not so extremem as the crying for hours, but here's two things we tried. When they were in our bed we would make it really uncomfortable. Not giving them pillows saying "you can have your pillow in your bed" throwing the covers off "saying you can have your covers in your bed" safely squishing them between us and pretending to be asleep. That seemed to work the best because then there bed was more comfortable. We also tried setting up a bed on the floor of their room or another room. It at least kept them out of our bed even though they didn't sleep the best there. Good luck. Especially being pregnant you need all the sleep you can find. Hope things get better. And congrats on the new little one.

Carissa Poyfair said...

I hope all this advice helps! We had to put a child lock on Jack's door (the kids you have to squeeze to open the door) and that worked until he learned how to take the child lock off (darn smart kid) then we used bribery (ice cream for breakfast, McDonald's, TV time, etc). Eventually they will understand, and I know you hate to hear this, but you can not give in! If you want your bedroom kid free, then it has to be that way all the time. Hope something works out. You have got to be tired with all that plus pregnancy. Good luck!

JerieH said...

Ok, I know many of you will not like this, but we taught Jacob to stay in bed by swatting his bum and putting him back in when he got out. He wasn't more than 18 months we switched him to a toddler bed, and from the start we made the consequence clear. I think it only took a couple of nights (like when we taught him to sleep through the night)... it was really rough for a couple of days, but worth it in the end.

Also, go back to 101 Psych. Even giving in every once in a blue moon is enough to teach them to try.

Hang in there! We are rooting for you!

Kellie said...

We've already tried most of these suggestions. We don't need a lock on our door because it's too tight for the door frame, so she can't get in if our door is closed anyway. We used a gate at her door; she knows how to open it even if the shutting mechanism is on the opposite side. Jeri, we've done the spanking thing, too. Doesn't work for her at all. She's actually laughed at most of her spanks. We've bribed and threatened. Making the bed uncomfortable won't work because she's the one to kick off the blankets and get rid of the pillow. We don't have one of those round door handle things and here's why that won't work for me--Jeremy has to be able to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

Last night we brought a teddy bear to her and called it Bedtime Bear. She only gets it if she's in her bed. She didn't care. She wanted it, but she wanted me more.

I don't know what we'll do. Just keep truckin' and praying that she'll sleep through the night.

Summer said...

This may sound mean, but we locked Andrew in his room at night when he was little. Eventually, he got the message. Good Luck with that!

Summer said...

Oh whoops, I should have read the other comments before I commented. :)

Colin & Lori said...

Maybe you can move Jeremy to Megan's room for a bit. Just put him on a mattress on the floor or make a blanket bed for him on the floor. He would probably do okay and it would be temporary. Make it fun for him and put a fan or something with white noise so they won't wake up from the screaming. Then you can lock Miss Emma in and Jeremy can still get up to potty at night. I would think after about two weeks she would get the picture and as always, be consistent about bed-time routine. I hate the Super Nanny suggestion to take them back over and over too. You stay in your bed or it gets locked and you can't come out. I hope this helps. She is a smart girl but you are smarter!

The Elledges said...

My parents dealt with a similar situation raising my younger brother. He would not sleep by himself. When he was over two they finally brought his crib in their room and let him scream in it for a couple nights until he quit. My mom slept on the couch and my dad stayed in the room with him to just be there and pat his back every now and then. Once he got good at sleeping in my parents room they moved his crib back into his room and my Dad slept in a sleeping bag in there for a couple days.

Besides that the only thing I can think of is make sure she has a nightlight, stuffed animals/blankets whatever she likes for comfort, make sure its not to hot or cold, make sure shes not too tired or hungry or sick.

Maybe read up on some babycenter forums for ideas...

good luck

Crystal said...

2 months later...not sure if you still need advice

I've been reading the book "Good Night Sleep Tight" and it is excellent. It has advice on sleep issues for kids 0-5.

We have never let a kid in our bed. I get out of bed to nurse. Tiring, but worth the results. Maybe that would help in avoiding sleep problems with your next one (congrats!).