Did you know that I can train baby chickens? I can. I have twice taught baby chicks to turn clockwise and counterclockwise circles and peck at red and white dots in complex orders--all for food.
(I was also supposed to train a rat, but I didn't like the rat. Once it bit me in front of a guy I had a crush on ((way before I met Nathan)) and I made sure that rat died.)
I even showed my amazingness to Elder Bednar when he was president at Ricks. (Is it obvious I can't say BYU-I?) I showed Elder Bednar and a bunch of rich people who were thinking about investing in the college.
They thought I was cool.
Yes, I can train chickens.
But I cannot for the life of me train my children--or myself for that matter.
Does this make the chickens smarter?