Monday, June 2, 2008

I'm Bleeding!

Church yesterday was exciting. Nathan had to work from noon to 5PM, so I wasn't planning on going to Sacrament meeting. I planned on showing up in time for Sunday School, that way I could just drop Megan off at Primary and Jeremy off in Nursery. However, the subject for the next post changed things a bit and I decided to try Sacrament meeting. A friend offered to sit with me and help out with the kids, so I figured it wouldn't be too bad.

It ended up that we got there late and I didn't feel like dragging three kids through the pews, so I decided we'd sit out in the foyer and listen to the meeting instead. It was still difficult, but not as bad. Jeremy constantly tried to get into the Chapel and succeeded once, getting all the way up to the stand and onto the lap of our first councilor. I was feeding Emma and couldn't just run up there. Luckily, my friend that offered to help saw what was happening and ran up to get him. Then she let him sit with her and her family for a while. Megan, on the other hand, was "Little Miss Immodest." The girl loves to (loudly) point out girls that dress immodestly and loves to tell me when the Disney princesses aren't dressed appropriately, especially Jasmine. But put her in a dress and she will sit in the most inappropriate positions so that all you can see is her bright, multi-colored panties. I could not get the girl to close her legs for more than ten seconds.

It wouldn't have been too bad if that was all she'd done during the meeting. However, there would be no post if that was it. As the closing prayer was being given she started to open a door into the vestibule. I didn't want her and Jeremy going into the vestibule and escaping outside, so I told her to come back and fold her arms for the prayer. She looked right at me, opened the door, let Jeremy through into the vestibule, and then started to walk into it- all the while watching my eyes flicker. I'd had enough of her not listening to me.

Of course it wasn't just the underwear thing where she'd been disobedient, there was a multitude of little things, so it was not like "Ok, that's the second thing you've done to tick me off, no more nice mom!"

I went over to her and told her to sit down on a chair for a time out. She yelled no at me and so I told her that if she didn't go sit down, I would pick her up and put her in the chair. Once again she yelled no at me. I told her to stop yelling no and of course she yelled no at me again. I picked her up and put her in the chair. She continued to yell no at me over and over. I went back to her after getting Jeremy out of the vestibule and warned her that I'd give her spanking if she continued yelling no. She yelled no and so I smacked her upper thigh. It wasn't hard, but it did echo, thanks to the wonderful acoustics of the foyer.

As soon as I stepped away from her so I could go catch Jeremy again she began to cry. No, cry isn't a strong enough word. It was more like a great wailing and gnashing of teeth. Then came the kicker. She began to scream, "It's bleeding!! It's bleeding!" Over and over she proclaimed to the whole ward, that was by now getting up from Sacrament meeting, that she was bleeding. Of course she wasn't bleeding, but this is one of her favorite things to say after getting a spanking. I don't know if she honestly thinks she's bleeding or not, but it is really annoying.

Now you have to understand. I really didn't spank her hard at all. You could pat her head with one finger and if she misinterprets it (or interprets it correctly for that matter) as a punishment, then she will promptly scream out in "pain" and declare that she will die from your intolerable and insensitive cruelty. The girl is a Drama Queen in every sense.

Does anyone else's kids do this? I thought for sure someone was going to call Child Protection Services on me.


Emily said...

oh are definitely not the onlt one with a drama queen at home!!! Your story could've easily been on my blog Megan's name changed to Amelia. I also had to hand off Andrew (while he was taking a bottle)to a friend this Sunday and take Amelia out to discipline her (Bryan is the worship leader so he can't sit with us)...I feel your pain!!!

Leanne said...

Reuben yells at me all the time, and if I lay any kind of finger on him he tells me that I hurt him. "No" is the staple word in his vocabulary. I'm hoping that age 4 is easier...I honestly miss him being 2. Is there something wrong with me? I think 2 is better than least when it's your first kid. We'll see with the second and subsequent children.

When are you guys going to be in SLC? We need to get together before you move across the country.

janeen said...

Too funny! When Keegan gets spanked he yells out that he's bleeding too. And If I touch any part of his head, he'll yell out to everyone that I am choking him! Kid's they are a riot!
And speaking of a riot. Keegan is still in love with Megan (check out my post) and he would like to see her sometime before you move, if it's possible!

Danyelle Ferguson said...

Girlfriend, I'm right there with ya! This past Sunday, John overslept, so I took two of our four kids to church with me for sacrament, leaving him to deal with the other two. Of course, all the kids were ready to go - but since John overslept, I didn't even get to shower. And we couldn't be late cause one of our kids was singing in sacrament. Isn't that just the way it is?

We've actually been having a hard time with our oldest who has autism lately. He's realized if he bites his helper, he gets to go home and into time out. Hmm . . . we need to re-think an even worse punishment so he'll stop. Ugh!

But believe me, all families have days, weeks, even months and years of "Horrid Sunday" stories they could share!