Thursday, January 8, 2009

A Mother's New Year's Resolutions

I came across this blog months ago when someone else (I think maybe Navel Gazing?) put up a link to it on her blog. I asked for permission to post the whole thing on my blog, but was denied since her blog is copyrighted. I think this post is something that every mom who has ever felt frustrated with her children should read. And isn't that all of us? We all have our moments of craziness whene we are rushed and frazzled and whene we feel like one more thing is going to just push us over the edge. Then we reach that one more thing and what do we do? Go read this and then come back. I'll wait.

AntiqueMommy
click the link or copy paste this:
http://antiquemommy.com/2008/09/17/in-motherhood-forgiveness-trumps-failure/


Ok, now that you've read it and presumably gotten some toilet paper from the bathroom to blow your nose (I never have Kleenex, just good ol' T.P.) we can go on.

I have thought about this story many times since I first read it a few months ago. While my kids have never said what her little boy stated so eloquently, I know when I get upset at my kids for whatever my personal "ball of tape" is, be it my crafts, sewing, books, fish food, toothpaste, or any of the 100 things I've repeatedly asked my kids to stay away from, or when I get mad at them for any other reason, I know that they are thinking and feeling the same way as this little boy.

My New Year's Resolutions this year mostly involve improving my relationship with my children. I've promised myself to play more, be more gentle and understanding, less quick to upset or anger, and no more yelling unless someone is in danger. I haven't done that great so far, but really, I've spent most of the New Year in a van or hotel room with them, unable to escape for even a few moments. Now that we are home and aren't feeling like we're duct taped to each other anymore it should be a little easier. I've also resolved to go to bed sooner (which I recently discovered means I need to look at a clock more often at night, otherwise it gets to be midnight and I think it's still 10:30 PM), and write an hour a day (my blog doesn't count). To help me with these goals I've enlisted Nathan who, so far, seems happy to help.

I really don't want to be the mom I am right now. I want to be a better mom. The best mom I can be. I want to have more patience; I want to have a better understanding of what is important and what isn't; I want to let my kids know that I value them above my "tape."

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are a great mom!! And your goals are amazing towards your kids because they show your true goodness. Most people would try to have goals to have better behaved kids not the other way around.

rachel said...

I really like this post! What worthwhile goals- nothing is more important than our role as moms. I want to write at least an hour a day too! I'm so sad, but I don't think I'm going to be able to go to the Storyteller's conference this year! We were hit a bit hard with my medical bills and I don't have much left over as I go over our budget. It's too bad cuz I really do need the inspiration. I can't wait to see what you think of it this year if you go. Hopefully you will get some amazing ideas. Have you been going every year?

Anonymous said...

this is a great post! i want to be a better mom, too!

Emily said...

I am right there with you! One time Amelia kept asking me to do something with her and I said, "just a minute," and she replied, "you've said that a lot today." It killed me! I have also resolved to play more with my kids and to see things from their perspective, such as how they feel when I blow them off or how my facial expressions or tone of voice register with them. It's so nice to know I'm not the only mom that struggles with this! Pray for me to do well and I'll do the same for you!

Ry and Kris Jones said...

I wish I knew what you were talking about. I want to be a mommy. That's my New Year's resolution:). I loved this post. You are such a cutie, and very good mother already!! And thanks for playing games with us, we always enjoy it:)

janeen said...

what a great resolution. My resolutions were all shallow, like lossing weight.
I too lose it with my kids more than I should, some times I catch the kids just waiting for my reaction. That's when i realize that I need to be less anal and more fun! Good luck with your goal, I'll make it my goal now too.

Little GrumpyAngel said...

I think you are half-way to accomplishing your goal. In my opinion the biggest part of becoming "better" is a self-awareness of what it is you want to make better. Also an awareness that you become "better" because you were already good. Sounds to me like you are already a very good Mom because you care.

And thank you for linking to that post. That was very touching.